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Happy Go Stuckey

Tethering Grace & Togetherness

Triggers and Grace

February 16, 2016 by HappyGoStuckey Leave a Comment

Way back when my knobby knees stuck straight out from my chair and my feet were years from touching the floor, I dreamed of being a mother. With my plastic stroller full of babies and one of my mom’s old purses grazing my ankles, I was living the dream. Playing mommy was the dream I never quite outgrew.

on familyMany years later I fought hot tears in my sun-drenched kitchen and took yet another deep breath. I was frustrated beyond belief at my darling and utterly stubborn child. She had disobeyed again…in the same manner, in the same way, and with the same complete disregard for my direction– as the previous three times that hour. I was not getting through to her, and she was not at all aware of the boiling hot anger rising in my chest. I was frustrated with her to be sure, but more than anything I was just so angry at how hard this all was. My indignation at her disobedience was quickly replacing the patience in my heart with ice water. It stung more than just my eyes to be ignored again. As she turned and walked toward the steps to return to her room for nap time, I sighed deep and listened to my own heart.

“Why do I even speak kindly to them if no one even hears me until I yell?!”  

My raised voice concerned me. But my furrowed brow and disgusted face scared me even more. When did I become that mom? When did I start using volume as an attention-getting tactic? I knew my anger was prompted by several things, but more than anything– I knew it was the result of my own sin. Even asking forgiveness in that moment led me to further ask how I got there, to that place of biting tones and words spat in frustration on little ears.

When I first met my friend Wendy last fall, she shared with me about her new book which dealt Biblically with this very same Mama struggle. And if I’m being completely honest, just hearing that someone else who loved Jesus and loved their kids struggled in the same way I had– was nothing short of freeing for me. Because let’s face it. We all struggle with the reality of motherhood. We all find opposition whether inside or outside of ourselves as we strive to lead our little ones rightly.

We are imperfect people leading imperfect people and sometimes it feels like spreading very cold butter on soft fresh bread– frustrating and bound to leave a few marks. 

But y’all. This book: Triggers: Exchanging Parents’ Angry Reactions For Gentle Biblical Responses is the manual for the imperfect mama who wants to truly love her children with the love of Jesus. It’s conversational, devotional and yet, practical in a way I needed so badly. Triggers is written by Wendy Speake & Amber Lia, two moms with different backgrounds who bring treasured input to this discussion of how to love and lead our children well.

Divided into 31 bite-sized chapters, each dealing with a separate internal or external anger trigger, the book is so much more than a how-to. Every little bit is artfully wound through with scripture and prayer. Because if you are anything like me, you do need wisdom and guidance on the journey of motherhood, but you need that guidance to be rooted in the absolute truth of Scripture.

I highly recommend this book for the mom who feels frustrated in her mothering or just wishes she had the creative corrections to give at the proper time. Triggers releases today and you can get a copy HERE! I’ll leave you with one of my favorite quotes and then you can hop on over and pick yourself up a copy!

Let us not undo them in our attempts to redo them better, but let us partner with the One who made them for His glory – strong-willed, tenacious, and fierce!   –Triggers, pg. 27  

 

**Amazon links are affiliate enabled. I was gifted with an advance copy of Triggers in exchange my honest opinion.**

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I'm Cynthia and I'm so glad you're here. I am an introvert with an extrovert's love of gathering people together. I love good books and capturing moments. Whether you visit me here or on my own front porch, I'll be the one holding the Iced Coffee for us both.

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happygostuckey

Joy is the courage of people who don’t have all Joy is the courage of people who don’t have all the answers, yet.

While you sit in a season of waiting,
the calendar can often be a cruel companion, reminding you that days go by, weeks, months— with what feels like very little change in the right direction.

Perhaps you can easily assent to: 
“Hope deferred makes the heart sick,

but you strain to see just how it will be when: “...a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.” (Proverbs 13:12)

Wherever you and I are today— whether we wander, wait, stand firmly planted, or some pressed together combination of all three — we can take heart.

We are not alone.
And this will not be wasted.
What seems to be an unending blank space, an indefinite pause, is a space for new things.

Long before all is made right, and whether or not it all is tied up neatly with a perfectly crafted bow— we can know this:

We do not have to know the outcome to be faithful today.

✨Joy is not disregard for reality as much as it is obstinacy against despair.✨
Hi 👋🏻 I’m Cynthia and I’m a bit weary. T Hi 👋🏻 I’m Cynthia and I’m a bit weary. There. I said it. These days I’m gravitating to the true & the beautiful as rest for my weary self... and I wonder if you are too.

So much so, that I’m starting a new little offering, it’s called “The Feast: Wonder for the Weary” and the first issue goes out this weekend. It’s a bit more personal (okay this first one is WAY more personal. 🤭) It will be a little bit of everything, all with the goal of offering REST to both the feasters & foragers alike. If you’re already a subscriber— no need to do anything, if not— click through my bio to “keep in touch” and join the feast.✨
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We hold questions without answers— yet we hold them in hands already full of good things.

We hold our daily bread, our daily gifts, and we hold the daily closeness of the God Who Sees.

The God who is no stranger to our lament, and Who Is the reason for our every hope.
He does not grow weary of our asking. Of our need to be told again, He will. 

You friend, are not invisible.
You are seen and cared for by the God who does all things well. (Even when they feel anything but.)
Married love ambition: making the kids roll their Married love ambition: making the kids roll their eyes at our “gushy-ness” as often as possible. 

President & CEO of the Lance Stuckey Fan Club— in every season, but especially on days like today.
Rainy day Mocha date, courtesy of our own toasty k Rainy day Mocha date, courtesy of our own toasty kitchen.😍🌧📚

On this chilly Saturday, we spent entirely too long browsing for books at our library and then all came home to a fire, mochas, and cocoa, respectively. Of all the things we do not know at this very moment, we know the gifts abound, and are worth counting.

PS, if you haven’t spread whipped cream on a foil-lined baking sheet to freeze, and then cut out cute shapes with cookie cutters to top your coffee or hot cocoa, may I suggest you get thee on that at once.
“If God sends us on strong paths, we are provide “If God sends us on strong paths, we are provided strong shoes.” — Corrie Ten Boom

✨File under, things to save in a fire.✨

The prayer journal pictured here contains six months of the hard & the sweet.
Six months of prayers asked & answered for ourselves and for others.
Six months of seeing through prayer, not how it changed our circumstances necessarily but how it changed us.

I always appreciate a record like this— being able to clearly see the paths we are led down, rocky though they may be? Priceless.

The ways God has come near us & drawn us to Himself again and again are written on these pages and I’ll treasure it forever.

Also pictured: Psalms Illuminated Scripture Journal. Highly recommend. Thank you always, @allifarnell
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J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring

While scrolling through my photos today, my heart was heavy to realize how far back “before” was.

Before masks and distancing, before loss, before other, more personal bits of hard. Multitudinous change, neither all bad nor all good.

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I’m leaning increasingly more into the analog th I’m leaning increasingly more into the analog these days.

It started with the Sourdough and a dozen different kinds of jam last year.
I suddenly find great calm in activities that stand in direction opposition to hurry, the textbook definition of ✨work in progress.✨ And really, if you could see the other side of this piece, you would believe me. 🙃

Thank you to @thebarmyfox for making embroidery so accessible!
@thenester says, “It doesn’t have to be perfec @thenester says, “It doesn’t have to be perfect to be beautiful,” and I believe that the weeknight meal equivalent is, “Just because it’s easy— doesn’t make it a second-tier supper!”

Thank you, Spaghetti with Meat sauce for being both a ministry to mom AND a crowd pleaser. Especially on a dreary January-ish day. It is ✨quite alright✨ to make something we’ve made a million times just because we know it makes the people happy.🍝
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