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Happy Go Stuckey

Tethering Grace & Togetherness

Grateful

May 8, 2014 by HappyGoStuckey 12 Comments

This is it.

The last known *good* picture before I became an official (baby-on-the-outside) mother.

All the other pictures of the weekend involve swollen things. Ankles, Feet, Faces. And pictures of the triage room of REX Hospital.
040409 083This picture says so much to me. So much love we had (have) for each other.

So much anticipation. So much hope and excitement. So much humor in that when Lance said he wanted to graduate before babies… well, we just squeaked past that deadline.

So much we thought we knew that we were getting into.

It just so happens we had absolutely no idea. 

I had absolutely no idea the way my heart would feel– so full it would burst when standing over their beds at night.

I had not a clue how hard it would be to see my own sin displayed in sweet cherubic faces… and not be convicted.

It had not entered my mind the hilarious joy we would find in bedtime dance parties on the dark, shiny floors.

I did not realize how hard it would be finish a thought, a conversation, a book… a cup of coffee. Nor did I think those things would matter as much as they sometimes do. Even less did I realize how guilty I would feel when the selfishness would creep in and steal my Mama-joy.

I did not know the depth of the joy.

Frankly, I did not know the depth of the sacrifice. Because it might come with the bite of the first (or 976th) saltine cracker; but the sacrifice goes on and on way past nausea and post-partum pains.   If there is LOVE, there is always some degree of sacrifice.

And nothing. Nothing could have prepared me for the GRATEFULNESS which my heart knows.

We wake and we play and we learn and we go and we do…

And all the while, we count gifts. Thousands of them.

Stones of Remembrance. Mile Markers to HIS grace. Mental scrapbooks of all we have been given and blessed with.

I pray that the GRATEFULNESS we know is bigger and wider and longer than any other element of this Mama-Child Love.

And I am so very grateful that someone, two someone’s call me Mommy.

 

Why May is already amazing…
Best. Day. Ever. (Our Magic Kingdom Marathon!)

Comments

  1. Whitney from Beauty in the Mess says

    May 8, 2014 at 11:26 pm

    Beautiful mama!! I love your picture too! How crazy that she was born the weekend of graduation!! Motherhood is hard, but so worth it. Happy early Mother’s Day!!

    Reply
  2. Karrilee Aggett says

    May 9, 2014 at 12:15 am

    This – my friend – is all kinds of Beautiful! What a tribute and a blessing! So glad we are neighbors today over at Lisa-Jo’s… so glad we are Mama’s in this journey together!

    Reply
  3. Jamie Gunn says

    May 9, 2014 at 1:47 am

    Love without sacrifice…not for God, not for us…LOVE! Beautiful!

    Reply
  4. Ruth says

    May 9, 2014 at 3:23 am

    Thanks for sharing it… it’s a challenge to accept the depth of sacrifice required with gratitude – isn’t it true so many blessings come with challenges too? I’m touched to read that your joy and gratitude are overwhelming the sense of sacrifice, and pray that you will always find your way back to gratitude when the sacrifice seems so very great.

    Reply
  5. jenpcv says

    May 9, 2014 at 6:47 am

    I’ve got a few tears in my eyes….so many beautiful words! I’m not a momma, but your words hit me right in the heart. And make me want to call my Momma! Because I’m so grateful I get to call her Mom!!

    Reply
  6. Holly Barrett says

    May 9, 2014 at 7:10 am

    Sweet words, dear friend! Love the picture and the memories you shared. Love the reminder to look for the “mile markers of HIS grace.” Yes!

    Reply
  7. Meredith Bernard says

    May 9, 2014 at 9:02 am

    Such sweet words from such a sweet mama. That photo of your husband kissing your baby belly? I melt. It is amazing how these littles affect every ounce of our being, isn’t it? And, oh, the sacrifice. So true. And such a blessing. And yes, so much to be grateful for! Mothers Day blessings to you this weekend…Meredith

    Reply
  8. judith heaney says

    May 9, 2014 at 9:34 am

    What a beautiful tribute of thankfulness for who you are and what you have.

    And, oh, these words were so convicting to me: I did not realize how hard it would be finish a thought, a conversation, a book… a cup of coffee. Nor did I think those things would matter as much as they sometimes do. Even less did I realize how guilty I would feel when the selfishness would creep in and steal my Mama-joy.

    Oh, the mornings I have coveted my coffee and felt annoyed at the interruption of two little girls; and the immediate conviction of my selfishness.

    Thank you for sharing your heart and your words. And for the beautiful image of the mental scrapbooks and Mile Markers of his grace. Wonderful images that I will carry with me today.

    Blessings, mama!

    Reply
  9. Rebekah says

    May 9, 2014 at 3:10 pm

    The Mama journey is such a hard, beautiful one – isn’t it. “Depth of Sacrifice” – so true, and so worth every bit. I love this honest tribute that you share here and am grateful for the joy you remind us of and the friendship we share in this community.

    Reply
  10. Jolene Underwood (@Faith_Eyes) says

    May 9, 2014 at 7:13 pm

    Beautiful post! Oh those joys are so precious. I loved hearing the special moments and the unique ways you and your beloved have enjoyed this journey of parenting.

    Reply
  11. Kayla Aimee (@kaylaaimee) says

    May 10, 2014 at 10:56 am

    This is so sweet!

    Reply
  12. kellysshining says

    May 10, 2014 at 3:42 pm

    What an incredible post. I felt my heart just swell. And that photo of your husband kissing your belly, darling. What a beautiful life and what a wonderful blessing to be a mom. 🙂 Happy Mother’s Day!

    Reply

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I'm Cynthia and I'm so glad you're here. I am an introvert with an extrovert's love of gathering people together. I love good books and capturing moments. Whether you visit me here or on my own front porch, I'll be the one holding the Iced Coffee for us both.

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Joy is the courage of people who don’t have all Joy is the courage of people who don’t have all the answers, yet.

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“Hope deferred makes the heart sick,

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We are not alone.
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We do not have to know the outcome to be faithful today.

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We hold our daily bread, our daily gifts, and we hold the daily closeness of the God Who Sees.

The God who is no stranger to our lament, and Who Is the reason for our every hope.
He does not grow weary of our asking. Of our need to be told again, He will. 

You friend, are not invisible.
You are seen and cared for by the God who does all things well. (Even when they feel anything but.)
Married love ambition: making the kids roll their Married love ambition: making the kids roll their eyes at our “gushy-ness” as often as possible. 

President & CEO of the Lance Stuckey Fan Club— in every season, but especially on days like today.
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✨File under, things to save in a fire.✨

The prayer journal pictured here contains six months of the hard & the sweet.
Six months of prayers asked & answered for ourselves and for others.
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J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring

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It started with the Sourdough and a dozen different kinds of jam last year.
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