HappyGoStuckey

Belong. (FMF)

July 10, 2014 by HappyGoStuckey 10 Comments

Last year around about this time I was given the best birthday gift ever. The gift of… a space that was all mine in which to write, and perhaps even better— the gift of support.

On the morning of my 31st birthday, my sweet husband presented me with a newly purchased domain name complete with the new logo we played around with— I was giddy. I was breathless. I was.. terrified.

Because it had become real. And I knew that this was just one more bit of gentle nudging from God to “do it.” To write more. To write for HIM. To write and so give of myself.

Three months later, I packed up my Soft, Brown Target riding boots and way too many cardigans and I went to the Allume conference. I knew He was nudging me to go there, too.

I went with many thoughts. Many concerns. Many general wonderings. One over-arching concern— “will I even belong with all these REAL writers?”

20 minutes in and I was still kind of a nervous wreck. I was working one of the registration tables— because really, what better way to jump into an unknown situation but by hiding behind the table that gives out the awesome swag bag, right?!

I saw lots of women. Many looked familiar. Some did not. Many I even read on a regular basis— but they all seemed to know each other. They all seemed to belong, and for one fleeting moment I considered maybe I shouldn’t be here…

But somewhere between that first cup of Just-Love Coffee and five minutes into the first keynote, I took a moment to look outside my paralyzing tentativeness and just look around.

And I saw so much. From those catching up with online connections that now had beautiful, real life faces to those shifting their stuff around and nervously hoping someone would want to make a connection with them. (Nervous Shifter, party of One right here.)

But in my momentary alone-ness, I saw what we all need to know so desperately.
The only reason any of us can “belong” is because we belong to Him.

The good news? Yes, I did make connections. Many whom have been chief encouragers in this writing space over this last year.

But the really great news… that one small step of STEPPING OUT into a world I wanted to belong in, found me face to face with a God who took that time to confirm what He had been growing in my heart for a long time.

I came with a passion and a desire to write. But I left with a community. A belonging. A brand-new understanding of what living out art as worship means—

And the GIFT of being known- both by my creative Creator

and REAL writers who are such because they are REAL people.

Writing this lovingly for my Five Minute Friday crew — We are at Crystal’s place this week!! Love her! I also to encourage you to join some of us at Allume this year! I’m also going to Declare in just about a month! Anybody want to save me a seat and cup of coffee??

No Longer Waiting to Exhale (FMF)

July 3, 2014 by HappyGoStuckey 12 Comments

I’ve been sighing all day long. In the last 18 hours, I’ve exhaled many times.

I exhaled when 47 minutes into a 5 hour drive, she asked, “where are we going?” for the 11th time.

I breathed out deep when our lunch-time detour took all four of us to unexpected river-front meal and a few minutes off the interstate did us all a little bit of good.

I exhaled down to my painted toenails when we drove across the rocky driveway of my parents, the same home I once drove away from for college– the home I love to go to sleep in and wake up in and drink coffee in and be someone’s kid in.

Two hours later and another short drive gave way to another familiar home. And the sweet family of two has become a family of three in just the last five days. And he’s perfect. And healthy. And so. very. small. And his parents overflow with all-of-a-sudden HUGE love and just a little bit of exhaustion. And I hold the tiny little image bearer in my arms and look up at her–his mama (!) and she did it! And he’s here! And we exhale together in unbelief and thankfulness. And the exhale squeezes out a few tears of utter and complete relief.

And it is SO good to exhale. And so needed. And I’m so in need of more of this in my life, in my summer.

I need less and less running and more of this stopping to notice the beautiful rhythm of the day.

Stopping to breathe in the gifts and breathe out the Thanks.

There are so many reasons to exhale all of this grace. So many reasons to be grateful. So much Thanks to give.

“For from his fullness we have all received, grace upon grace.” –John 1:16

Linking up to Five Minute Friday HERE.

Happy Monday!

June 30, 2014 by HappyGoStuckey 1 Comment

We had a great, mostly relaxing (there was one small incident at the Cracker Barrel with a certain two-year old we all know and love.) weekend around these parts. We made The Nester’s homemade pizza crust for dinner on Friday night and can I just say– It was delicious. It’s made with a portion of whole wheat flour, which I love and the texture is just so good. We have been making homemade pizza for years but something about her crust… I am going to go ahead and say it’s my favorite. Not too chewy, Not too crunchy. Just perfect. Try it, you might love it! The nester’s whole philosophy is “It doesn’t have to be perfect to be beautiful.” and WOW. The world needs a little more of that. I need a little more of that in my own life for sure. Our pizza crust was definitely a little… less than perfect but it tasted fantastic.

****

Something that did happen this weekend– and to say I’m ecstatic would be an understatement. But Charlie’s Mama -aka- Courtney had her baby!!! Only a couple days after her due date she went into labor and he was born this weekend, healthy and handsome! I share that for those of you who read my post last week, And so we wait. It turns out, he didn’t keep us waiting too long after all. So, my entire friday was spent staring at my phone. From the time I woke up to one of my absolute favorite kinds of texts–

4:06AM– “We are being checked into the hospital! Contractions are 3-5 minutes apart!”

To later that afternoon–

“Charlie is HERE!!!”

My emotions were ALL over the place. But aren’t new babies just the best? I can NOT wait to be able to meet him in person– hopefully very very soon! And to hug my dear friend’s neck who is now a beautiful Mama!

So yeah, that was definitely the HIGHLIGHT of our weekend. *****

On Saturday, Lucy had her 5th swim lesson. I was concerned about my very cautious child and what she would do when told to get in the water without her puddle jumper on– but she’s done really well. The last few days she has been a little fearful when going and I can tell she’s trying so hard to be brave. We were able to have a little chat about what her VBS verse from 2 weeks ago really means (Phil. 4:13) and I got a little shot of her showing me her “brave” face.

Mostly brave with a good bit of uncertainty. Ha! She is so my child.

Well, Happy Monday! Make it a good one!

And so we wait.

June 25, 2014 by HappyGoStuckey 1 Comment

My Dear Charlie’s Mama,

So yesterday was the day. June 24th. The date that I circled and highlighted and added to all of my calendars everywhere. Your due date.

Clearly, someone forgot to tell Baby Charlie. Because he was a no-show yesterday. Although we know (according to the professionals) that he is, in fact, on the way… and that any moment you will begin that glorious experience of knowing it’s time, grabbing your bag and the hand of the one you love and hopping in the car… but we wait.

And we wait some more. And I have to say…. anytime, now. I know I’m not nearly as invested as you are– after all it’s not my ribs he is vigorously kicking with all the skill of a World Cup contender. But, I’m a tad impatient.

And I know you are too. But that’s the thing about babies. They do come out. But as someone who knows how fantastic his mama is, I’m sure he’s just really content. You’ve made a great home for him, both in there– and out here. And he is one lucky little boy.

So, it’s just about the 9th inning. And here’s what you need to know.

Breathe. Not just in an out and through every contraction– but take deep breaths when the nights are long and the beautiful moments of being someone’s entire world take your breath away.

Sing. Sing him Happy Birthday an extra time and tell him it’s from me and I’ll be there as soon as I can. And when you snuggle him in his bed at night and you’re in awe of what you see and feel– sing over him as your God sings over you.

Listen. Listen fully and completely to the sound of that first cry as he breathes into this world and know that you will never, ever forget that sound.

And, most importantly, Remember. Remember that HE is Immanuel. GOD with you. He has been with you over these last 9 months of waiting and getting less and less comfortable. He will be with you as you arrive at the hospital, breathless and exhilarated and terrified all at the same time. He will be with you through every deep breath, every contraction, every bit of the way. He will be with you when 9 months of waiting give way to a few moments of pain, followed by the best moments of your life.

He is with you. He has been with you. He will be with you. And He goes before you.

So we will try to be patient, ok? I will if you will. Pinky promise? Love you.

“But now, thus says the Lord, your Creator, O Jacob,
And He who formed you, O Israel,
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by name; you are Mine!
2 “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
And through the rivers, they will not overflow you.
When you walk through the fire, you will not be scorched,
Nor will the flame burn you.
3 “For I am the Lord your God,
The Holy One of Israel, your Savior;
I have given Egypt as your ransom,
[a]Cush and Seba in your place.
4 “Since you are precious in My sight,
Since you are honored and I love you,”

Isaiah 43:1-4a

It matters.

June 23, 2014 by HappyGoStuckey 2 Comments

Psst. Hey, you.

Yes, you. With the 5 minutes to spare and the hastily drank cup of not-as-hot-as-you’d-like-it coffee.

I promise this won’t take long.

I won’t take up more than 3 or 4 minutes of your “me” time.

Can I just tell you a little secret? You are making a difference.

YOU. ARE.

MAKING. A. DIFFERENCE.

You might feel a bit worn down and like this “summer” has been all crazy-break-neck speed and very little whitespace.

But you’re changing lives. When God himself chose to plant those lives within yours, whether in your sweet Mommy tummy or within your giving, open-armed heart for adoption, HE KNEW.

He KNEW you were the mother they needed. And that no one on earth could do it but you– for those kiddos.

He also KNEW you would need Him in order to mother them. He knew you would need to lean hard on Him, every second of every day.

Is it harder than you thought? Maybe the days are even longer than you imagined. The never-ending list of disposable tasks that must be done today and then done again tomorrow– maybe it all just wears you out. It is easy to get wrapped up and worn down by the sheer “do it just to do it again” of being in this role.

What you may not see now is that 10,000 peanut butter sandwiches from now, we will know that it did matter. Every spread of the knife. Every cut into a shape because it makes them smile. All this everydayness… it matters.

There is eternity woven into every little bit of our everydayness. It ALL matters. The socks you pick up and the little feet that wear them– they might walk an African jungle or a college campus someday– telling others of God’s never-stopping love for them.

One day they will be outside of our reach and we will have to step back in a big way and just trust.

But today we have them. Today they are little and they are ours for the loving.

Today you might feel as though you are just washing dishes. Washing little faces. Washing those grass stains out of a soccer jersey. But really? You are washing feet.

So be encouraged, Mama. Whatever the stage, it’s ok for it to be tough.

Just know that YOU MATTER.

And that not one of these little seemingly meaningless tasks is anything less than sacred.

“But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:9

Release. (FMF)

June 19, 2014 by HappyGoStuckey 11 Comments

I have this little 2 year old. She has shining blue eyes and a little bob that bounces into ringlets in the back.

She loves cheese sticks and blueberries… and drinking out of a cup that is not her own.

She loves life. She’s passionate. She’s the one with a belly-laugh that she cannot control if you tickle her underarms.

But when you want (or need) something she has… she’s not having it. Her sweet little hands go 100% white-knuckled if you try to get her to relinquish something she wants. She holds on with all her might. She gets down on the ground and hides whatever it is in both her arms and shakes her head fiercely. You might say she has a little stubborn streak. Some days the streak is broad like paint on the side of a barn.

After parenting her older sister, I am often completely bewildered at how to handle Stuckey Girl #2. I often find myself taking time outs and praying for something, anything, a little shred of wisdom at how to encourage her passion for life without her wholehearted disobedience. But I find myself falling even more in love with being her mother with every mini-meltdown. Because she is me.

I hold on to my dreams. I tight-fistedly grasp for my ideals of what my future holds. I get down on the floor of my heart and (gulp.) sometimes refuse to step out in complete freeing obedience. I choose fear and the mental fetal position and sleepless nights wrought with stress over the future that I just. cannot. fathom.

But God is gracious. And when I release those things I THINK I MUST hold on to– He gives the gift of His will and His best, played out in a way I never could orchestrate.

His story for me is the only story I ever want. The only story I ever want to tell. His plans are higher. He is El-Roi. The God who sees. And HE SEES ME in my smallness. In my fear. And He LOVES me enough to NOT let me wallow. He loves me enough not to leave me on the floor with arms wrapped tightly around fear, insecurity, anxiety. And I will choose to release whatever I’m holding on to every day if I have to.

For it is with EMPTY hands that we are OPEN and AVAILABLE and ready to be used.

Linking up for Five Minute Friday!

A little bit of Happy for your Wednesday

June 18, 2014 by HappyGoStuckey 1 Comment

HI. Happy Wednesday! We are mid-way through a week filled with VBS and a bunch of other wonderful, busy events and we. are. tired. around these parts. So much so that even my 5 yr. old has been willingly taking a nap every afternoon where she usually is totally against the idea.

For some strange reason, I’ve not been sleeping all that great lately– which is completely odd for me. I’m nothing if not a great sleeper. Even when I’ve been 9 months pregnant, or in the throes of a kidney stone (that one time) I CAN SLEEP for sure. But lately I’ve been Princess Toss-N-Turn so last night… Lance gave me a melatonin about 30 minutes before bed… and let me just say. Thank goodness for the person who first discovered it. I slept like a rock!

As exciting as my sleep patterns are— heres’ a few things to bring a little HAPPY to your Wednesday!

THIS song and video that Lance showed me. It’s actually done by a couple at our church and it is so pretty and peaceful, I just wanted to share the love!
[vimeo 50759457 w=500 h=281]

Number 2. Do you listen to Podcasts?

I love how they are giving me a courtesy smile but their eyes are glued to the screen! Ha!

I have only just recently discovered how fun and beneficial they can be– for the longest time I pictured them as a drier version of public broadcasting. Not true at all! There are hundreds of interesting topics and many great bloggers are beginning to take up podcasting– so the options are endless.

And let me just say– IF you find yourself in the car on a long trip with kiddos– listening to podcasts with earbuds is a GREAT escape from the 3,634th showing of FROZEN. I’ll definitely share more on this topic later, and share a few of my favorite podcasters but here is one from Tsh Oxenreider’s Podcast- the Art of Simple. In episode, #67– Tsh talks with Joshua Becker– on “Freedom from Stuff.” Joshua Becker writes the blog, Becoming Minimalist and his approach is so refreshing in a world of “All-or-Nothing” Simple Living. I enjoyed it so much we cleaned a bunch of toys out of the girl’s playroom and I’ve a plan to take on the rest of the house. So, do yourself a favor– subscribe to Tsh’s podcast through the podcast app on your phone or listen HERE.

And then finally– I just wanted to leave you with a little quote from Emily P. Freeman, from her book– A Million Little Ways.

“What makes us come alive goes deeper than what we choose to do in our professions and our free time. What makes us come alive is LIFE, and this life is Jesus. Painting, cooking, parenting, calculating, and conversation all have the potential to hold within them a mystery and an expression of our life in Christ.” (Freeman, A Million Little Ways, pg. 30)

If you have not read this book– I HIGHLY recommend it as un uplifting place to start when wondering what you should be “doing” and what you’re passionate about. This book taught me so much about using every little thing I do to bring pleasure and glory to God. In it I found a beautiful freedom to discover those things about myself that God created in me. And, it’s just a lovely read! Find it here on amazon- A Million Little Ways: Uncover the Art You Were Made to Live